October 19, 2021

My Husband’s Viagra Prescription Saved My Sex Life

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I had sex twice on Sunday, once in the afternoon and once after our kids went to bed. The second time my husband used the nipple clamp set we bought from Amazon, and if you’ve never used them, what the hell are you waiting for, fucking blue ?! (Here’s a guide on how to do it safely.) We’re almost forty years old and it got as hard as twenty-three, but sex lasted longer. And it looks bigger. No, seriously, he did. Probably only because it was harder. Always. They should hand out Viagra like a candy on every man’s 35th birthday.

Not for him. For his partner.

Why we had to use Viagra

My husband had been taking a class of depression and anxiety drugs called SSRIs for years, and, well… his cock’s performance had steadily declined for years. Not that it was Wrong. But he took longer to get tough. He did not get like hard (something I realized later via the comparison). Sometimes he just couldn’t do it at all, and it sucked for our sex life: I didn’t want to try again, because it was kind of like my fault. This was not the case. But when you both want to fuck and are faced with a soft cock, you can’t help but feel a certain sense of responsibility.

When he contracted a long-lasting illness and his doctor upped his Lexapro, his performance went from adequate to non-existent. Her psychiatrist might as well have been playing Taps for her dong when she wrote this prescription. He tried to divide his pills and take half in the morning, half in the evening. He tried to take the full dose in the morning. He tried to take the whole dose just before going to bed, as theoretically post-sex (or post-frustrating attempt at any sexual activity). Nothing worked.

He called her. They had already tried other classes of antidepressants that have fewer sexual side effects. Aside from his blundering issues, Lexapro has worked very well for him. She shrugged and told him to come get a prescription for Viagra.

And oh, shame!

When you and your partner go into quarantine and their doctor says “Come and get your Viagra prescription” you hear that cheerful business voice saying “Talk to your doctor about Viagra!” And warning about erections that can last longer than four hours. You see the elderly. As, The elderly baby boomers, with a lot of gray in their hair, inexplicably perhaps sitting in tubs as they watch the sunset. And you support the right of the elderly to knock, really, and you hope that when you get old you wear purple, with a red hat that doesn’t fit and that doesn’t fit, and hop on home breastfeeding. Corn you are not old.

Yes, there may be some gray. And no one card you anymore. Your high school reading list has turned into a retro joke and the kids at The TikTok are laughing at your side. But youe aren’t old enough to tell your doctor about Viagra, damn it. Even if you remember Miss Cleo telling you “Call now for your free reading”.

Except your partner’s cock isn’t performing well, so apparently you are, and if you want that cock again, you have a choice.

So we tried Viagra

So my husband filled the prescription for Viagra, which the insurance covered, because don’t get me started on the importance of his cock function to my epidural. We took him home. He threw away his pill; we had fun for half an hour and waited.

And oh my god hit me baby one more time

And then he did.

His cock was hard. Like, hard porn star. If you’re not in your twenties, you might have forgotten what it’s like to fuck a pornstar cock. Let me jog your memory: it’s fantastic to fuck a pornstar cock. Once he got up he stayed up he lasted (but not too long), and then, about an hour later, he was ready again. I don’t care how it happened. I would have sacrificed a virgin to make his cock so hard. A stupid Viagra pill? Best deal already. Thanks, Big Pharma.

Other benefits include that half hour it takes to get started. It sounds like a downside. No, total victory, because you are wrapping yourself on your bed in pretty underwear; your partner says, “Should I take a pill? »You say yes; and they spend that half hour paying attention you. Then that rock hard erection occurs, and you are so ready for it. You can always schedule sex – take that Viagra when you get home after dinner – and if your partner wants dirty sex in the bathroom, they have to prepare for it. But you didn’t really want to bang in the bar bathroom, and seriously, once you see that erection you won’t care. I promise.

My husband likes this analogy: Viagra is like a calculator on SATs. Of course, you can do the math part without it. But if you have an option, why on earth wouldn’t you take advantage of it?

Viagra saved my sex life. No: Viagra made my sex life better. You are not old. You shouldn’t be ashamed. You will not regret it. Fantastic sex for everyone!

Talk to your doctor and see if Viagra is right for you. No seriously.

This is not an advertisement, just my real human experience.


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